The Brando

Multiple visits repeat Brando guest again left underwhelmed and disappointed by the food at The Brando. New fancy famous French chef who sold his name to the Brando but is not on sight would be embarrassed to be served many of the dishes…a so called “lobster roll” that is 90 % mayonnaise and 10% lobster with a shallow slit in the bun to give the appearance of an overloaded lobster roll was inedible. A small burger completely lost in an oversized brioche bun. Consumers at this level know all the tricks. So best to deliver quality product. Missing is what you would expect at a luxury resort beach restaurant…lots of crudo and sushi INCLUDED in the daily meal plan, poke bowls with generous portions of locally caught tuna and swordfish, fish tacos, ceviche’s, gourmet flatbreads and creative pasta dishes, DAILY specials… Perhaps abandoning a meal plan and going to an Ala carte would fix the problem? You are trying to profit by cutting corners on quality. Get a chef who will live ON ISLAND and babysit the kitchen staff while executing proper food for a 5 star private island resort. The island is spectacular, the villas are gorgeous and the spa is wonderful. I am not sure I will return until the food is fixed….spoke to many other guests while there and the feeling is mutual amongst most hotel guests.

I brought my parents to The Brando to celebrate my Fathers retirement and it was the absolute best choice I could have made. We didn't mention to the staff why we were there but we were of course treated like absolute royalty anyway. I can't even imagine how the service could have been better. It was actually straight up perfection. My parents and I are all well traveled and we all agreed service at the Brando is unmatched. As far as the resort itself I would simply describe it as otherworldly. Its absolutely stunning and picturesque at every turn. Words, pictures and videos truly don't do justice to just how magnificent this place really is. You've got to come see it for yourself. Thank you so much to staff and management at the Brando for an unforgettable trip. We really appreciate you all so much.

We spent a week at The Brando in October and WOW…our family is still talking about it! The property itself is absolutely stunning and the service is honestly out of this world. Every single detail is thought through. The staff is so friendly and on top of everything. They must study everyone’s itinerary daily because, no matter who you pass, they’ll know your plans for the day and wish you well. We’ve never stayed somewhere with a similar level of service as The Brando. The partnership with Tetiaroa makes the stay even more special. We spent so much time learning and exploring and the positive impact that they’re having on the environment will be felt for generations to come. The Brando belongs in a league of their own but, until that exists, every 5 star hotel GM should stay here in order to raise their own bar of service excellence. We joke that they have ruined us for future travel. 5 stars all around! Our only challenge now is to figure out how to make this “once in a lifetime trip” an annual vacation.

The island wasvery beautiful, we went for scuba diving as they have a dive center, but there was no reef system. So we didn't dive after first 2. We could not enjoy ANYWHERE OUTDOORS due to the flies!!! They make their own compost so there's a major issue! The dinner and lunch menus are very limited. A burger, club sandwich with 4 drinks over $300! It was a total waste, I do not recommend this exclusive island. They did refund us $27,000, but it was not worth the hassle of getting there.

This is the place of my dreams. Me and my husband visited for our honeymoon and it was beyond our greatest expectations. It is quite literally the best hotel we have visited ever. The rooms were pristine, clean and impeccable, the food was exceptional, but the service was the best of all. Everyone in the island is super exited to be working there, and make you feel at home at every moment. We will definitely be coming back. 10/10 recommend. Sof and Miguel

The Brando is an uber luxurious resort, and the only one located on the "Motu" (Island) of Onetahi on Tetiaroa atoll, which is a 20 minute (charter) flight from Papeete. It consists of just 35 rooms, but still manages to offer an array of dining and activity options to keep even the most active people from getting bored. We ended our 10 night French Polynesian trip by saving the best for last. This followed our stay at Four Seasons Resort Bora Bora - while they are different resorts and offer enough contrasts to make it a great combo stay, if we had to choose one it would be The Brando, hands down. It's less crowded, has better food, more polished service and has an air of luxury that the FS can't match. That said, we did enjoy the scenery and the overwater bungalow experience at the FS, as well as the magnificent shark and ray snorkeling tour, which should not be missed should you pay a visit to Bora Bora. We stayed in a 1BR Beachfront Villa on the Turtle Bay side. Our room (#202) was luxuriously appointed and had most of the amenities (toothbrush, body lotion, face moisturizer, etc.) that one would expect at a world-class resort. Two nits to pick: there was a treacherous step in the room (between bedroom and living room, and between the bathroom and bedroom) which - if you have a misstep - could easily ruin one's vacation. The other was the absence of a washlet toilet, which I feel should be mandatory for all top hotels by now. Our Villa was within short walking distance to everything (all restaurants, concierge, water sports shack, etc.), so we didn't even need to ride the bikes anywhere, which was nice. There are plenty of activities on offer; some of them are guided (most tours that requires a motor boat such as island hopping or snorkeling/scuba diving/fishing further out on the reef), while others can be done on your own, including kayaking, paddle boarding and snorkeling, among others. We did a half-day boat tour that included a visit to Reiono Island, where we did some light hiking in search of the infamous "Coconut Crab" (yes, we saw a pretty large one.) At the end of the tour we had a private lunch on the beach of an uninhabited island. We also did a tour with a naturalist who took us to the best spots on the atoll for snorkeling, followed by another high-quality lunch in an idyllic setting. One thing that stands out at The Brando is the food quality. Given its remote location and the fact that - generally - tropical seafood just isn't the best (relative to colder water fish like Sea Bass or Tuna, there's only so much you can do with Mahi Mahi or Parrot Fish), we enjoyed most of the dishes that we tried. They largely revamped the dining experience earlier this year - Jean Imbert produced the menu for Les Mutinés, as well as many of the offerings at Beachcomber Cafe and Bob's Bar. The Lobster Roll (on an awesome Brioche roll) was incredible, and the servings at Les Mutinés were very nicely done. The Parrot Fish served at the restau

An excellent hotel with top notch service. My wife and I started our Polynesian vacation here (after a brief night in Tahiti) and everything was truly first class and white-glove. It was the perfect start for us, as we really needed to just relax after a busy year (and a long trip). Many others chose to end their vacations here but, for us, starting here was the right call. The hotel is very special with unique excursions built around the remote location. I would especially like to thank Lourine (I hope I spelled her name correctly) for her commitment to excellence.

First of all we were poisoned at the resort, on purpose because we got a great deal and the general manager Mrs Valerie Gachon did not want us to stay at the resort, nor Mr Epinette. We vomited for 3 weeks and nobody from the resort helped us! The food and beverage manager screamed at us several times, in my opinion he poisoned us but he got the order from the management, the villa manager got into our villa every day without any allowance! There were dead geckos in the villa and on the terrace! My 5 year old sun was thrown into the pool with a stick by the villa manager! They killed at night baby turtles: I saw it with my own eyes! The Brando water was poisoned! The bathtub which is extremely old has only yellow water, in every bungalow! The sound system did not work! The staff is extremely rude and cut the brakes off the children's bike! Most of the staff is staying only for weeks on the island because there are weird things happening on this horrible island, you even cannot phone the emergency as the gm does not allow any emergency calls to Tahiti! Mr Epinette a man with many tattoos is very dangerous and if you are lucky he is not on the island! Stay away , otherwise...! You have to carry your kayaks yourself, all the bungalows are in need of renovation! Food is awful and poisoned! You are not allowed to have dinner on the beach even on an all inclusive package! They charge you 5000 US Dollar mandatory tip after your stay! You are not allowed to eat wagyu if you are all inclusive- crazy!!! The gm threatened us several times a day!!! But i always say: You always meet twice!